My Opening

Last night Scott and I had a birthing class with our midwives. Even though it is our second time around with these classes, I still get so much out of them. Besides learning and practicing pain coping techniques - all natural is the goal for childbirth - they really help us to look at the pregnancy, labor and delivery as a journey into motherhood, whether this is your first, second or eighth baby.

Occasionally we will either draw or write how we feel about motherhood, pain, partnership, or pregnancy in general. In this past class we painted about opening, and then we wrote about our painting. I am including my painting and explanation mainly for my own journaling, but also because I think that it is so important to not only focus on the physical changes that happen to a woman as her baby grows inside of her, but also on the emotional and psychological changes.

My Opening

The painting started with the idea of blue, a calming blue, as I oped up not only my cervix, but open up to the pain, to the idea of having another child to hold and to love. As I moved into the center of the "opening" the colors become more intense, as does the pain of childbirth and the love that comes to a woman toward her child. The painting process was slow at first - just half circles - but as I continued to paint, the scene opened up to be me, my heart opening and my mind opening to this new chapter of my life. The blue came to be the calming effect that Scott's love has on me, either in birth, in life or in love... he calms my soul and helps me to open.